Gizmo

You'll be amazed at how many people keep a special something with them on deployments.  Lots of people have pictures of their families and friends, some have some kind of souveneir (gosh, did I spell that right?  Ah hell, whatever) that they keep close to them.  These things come in all sorts of varieties-- t-shirts that smell of a special cologne (girls do this, duh), patches they've gotten from someone they made friends with (JT is one of these collectors), poetry folded and kept in their pocket everyday (Kyle keeps a certain one on him at all times), a small toy of their child's (my boss takes a pic of his son's lego-man everytime we go someplace new).  There are tons of examples; the fact is, people have found a way to keep their loved ones, memories, and other special things close to them.  It is a proven necessity to deploymental mental survival.

I have a special little item of my own.  Gizmo.  Yep, that's right.  The sweet and cuddly little gremlin.  He came in a huge plastic bag along with tons of other stuffed animals that were... meant for... kids.  I know, I know!  I'm horrible!  I took a fucking stuffed animal from a donation bag that was meant for kids!  Trust me, both M and Kyle have given me lots of shit about it.  BUT IT'S GIZMO!!!  Do you know how long it's been since I've seen a Gizmo?  I love Gizmo!  I already vowed that when I return home I'm going to donate a crapload of toys to the orphanage anyway and I'll spend a hell of a lot of money in shipping!  So it's more like a really good trade.  In fact, it's more than a trade.  It's a steal!  I took one little stuffed animal (remember, it's GIZMO-- not some Winnie the Pooh bear, Gizmo!) from a bag that had like 40 others in there.  And I'm going to send BOXES of toys in its place.  I promise!  Cross my heart, no fingers crossed.

Great now I feel like shit because I just spent an entire paragraph trying to justify why I took a stuffed animal.  But I now have a special item that I can take with me everytime we go to an outstation.  And I'll take him on my next deployment too. 

I guess it's just been a little lonely in my room and looking at my kids' pictures on my wall makes me want to hug something.  So now I have something to hug.  Gizmo.  And I'm keeping him.  And that's that.  :P